The ministry on this page is supplemental subjects on Christianity, the Bible, history, people, special papers, etc. Readers might pray about it to see what God will show them. Constructive comments are welcome at: email@example.com.
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- BIBLE COUNSEL - Section E
Some Thoughts On Ministry
The writer does not want to press on readers the ministry herein, but share thoughts and pray God will reveal the Word of Truth to those who are exercised thereby. No one can be "pressed" into truth. Those with concerns may feel free to write for some help or clarification. The desire here is to help seekers. -RLD: firstname.lastname@example.org
U R G E N T MANUFACTURER'S RECALL
Interesting Comical Note From The Internet By A Professing Christian Writer: P.B
"The Maker of all 'human beings' is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to a serious defect in
the primary and central component of the heart. This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units, code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units.! This defect has been technically termed: "Substantial Internal Non-morality," -commonly known as SIN, as it is primarily expressed.
Some other symptoms:
1. Loss of direction
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish, or violent behavior
6. Depression or confusion in the mental component
The Manufacturer, who is neither liable nor at fault for this defect, is providing factory-authorized repair and service, free of charge, to correct this "SIN" defect. The Repair Technician, JESUS, has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost of these repairs. There is no additional fee required.
The number to call for repair in all areas is: P-R-A-Y-E-R. Once connected, please upload your burden of SIN through the REPENTANCE procedure. Next, download ATONEMENT from the Repair technician: JESUS , into the heart component. No matter how big or small the SIN defect is, JESUS will replace it with:
9. Self control
Please see the operating manual: the B.I.B.L.E. (Believers Instructions Before Leaving Earth), for further details on the use of these fixes. WARNING: Continuing to operate the human-being unit without correction voids any manufacturer warranties, exposing the unit to dangers and problems too numerous to list, and will result in the human unit being permanently impounded. For free emergency service, call on JESUS.
DANGER: The human being units not responding to this recall action will have to be scrapped in the furnace. The SIN defect will not be permitted to enter Heaven so as to prevent contamination of that facility.
--Thank you for your attention! - GOD" --P.B.
[From Internet ---RLD: Auth-ge; 12/2006 ]